PERSUASIVE SPEECH. DRAFT #2

Do we need to postpone happiness?

Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.
- Aristotle.

Do you consider yourself a happy person? Right now. At this very moment. I hope, you do, because happiness, actually, does have a pretty important role in our lives, and it can have a huge impact on our mind-set.

Or are you a member of  “Be happy from tomorrow “ club? In fact, many people postpone happiness – they believe: “When this happens, I’ll finally be happy”.  When the "time to enjoy" points to a future, we loss some of the lighter joyful moments of life. We can’t just relax and enjoy the present. 

I would like to discuss the psychological problem of postponing happiness and cover the following aspects of the issue:

1.                    The rationalizations for postponing Happiness

2.                    The impact of postponing happiness

3.                    The means of cultivating happiness in our lives

I’ll start with noticing, that people tend to find justifications for everything they do. But what silly rationalizations do they have for postponing happiness?

Silly rationalization #1 — I’m Too Busy for Happiness.  Are you familiar with the feeling, when you wish to do something which makes you happy, but then you realize that there are so many things to do, which are more important, than just doing something pleasant? It feels as an indulgence, an almost frivolous waste of time. For example, you feel like reading a book from your list, watching a film or going out with friends, but a thought of tons of homework to do strikes you, and you delay doing something that makes you very happy until the work is done. It's never actually finished.  You want to accomplish some work for the following week, thus saving time. A vicious circle. In other words, you decide that you are way too busy to be happy at the very moment. 

Moreover, we often slide into prioritizing things that do not contribute to any real, lasting happiness. Instead of reading we find ourselves watching a banal sitcom, wasting time in the social media website, watching pictures of strangers, scrolling, browsing, surfing.

Silly rationalization #2 — Happiness is a Reward. We often see happiness as something that is to be reached. We think we need to work hard to achieve it. For example, we meet our friends at the weekend as a reward for all our hard work during the week.

It’s easy to see where the ‘happiness is a reward’ rationalization arises. We live in a culture that aspires to retirement, vacations and the almighty weekend.

3) Silly rationalization #3 — I Don’t Deserve Happiness

Deep down, some of us may have a reoccurring negative thought pattern that tells us that we don’t really deserve this level of happiness that doing pleasant things can bring us.

There is a bug in our system that constantly reminds us that we probably should work more, to achieve higher professional and personal results, realizing, that we are not as productive as we could be, then you ask yourself: “who am I to strive for soul-filling joy?”. We somehow come to believe that we don’t deserve genuine happiness. The Top Five Regrets of the Dying book by Bronnie Ware reminds us though that we don’t have to feel guilt about happiness — “it is a lighter feeling that we all desire”.

Another important message of my speech is: Postponing happiness, we postpone our life. The impact of postponing happiness is hard to underestimate. Have you got a list of things you want/wanted to experience, but always postponed it until tomorrow, next week, next year, next life..? Even if it’s not in written, I’m sure you do. If you look closely, you may notice, that most of them do not need a great amount of cash or conditions that you already possess in your life… In fact, you notice that most of the barriers are invisible and they are in our mindsets. Then the questions in your head arise: “Why do I plan for the dentist or the hairdresser and I don’t plan when I will go for painting in the woods? Why I don’t just make time for that??

Just imagine yourself in a several decades time, looking at your list of “all the things that I wanted to experience but”… What would you feel? Again, coming to the book of “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying”, we see the point: “I wish I had let myself be happier”.  Sooner or later most of us have to face the so-called existential crisis when we start finding and creating purpose, we come to understand, that there is nothing more consistent with unhappiness than spending your time in a way that doesn’t serve who you are.

So how can we cultivate the feeling of happiness? First of all, we need to understand that happiness is a mindful choice.

We tend to rely on time, people, circumstances for achieving the state of happiness. We seek for the external factors for our happiness - The “happy if,” argument.

Referring to the quotation of the Great philosopher Epictetus, - “Happiness shall depend as little as possible on external things”, you eventually come to understand: happiness is a choice, that you can actually achieve. Happiness is not a coincidence, something that just happens to us - it’s entirely our choice and responsibility.

So, is there any better kind of journey, than traveling your own path? Do you need to wait for a certain occasion to start being who you are?  The sooner you start to cultivate the feeling of happiness, the more prosperity you’ll achieve in your life.

To sum up, today we spoke about the rationalizations for postponing happiness, its impact and the means of cultivating happiness in our lives.

The way to be happy is more simple, than it seems to. Enjoy as you go, every step, every day, whenever you can. On a daily basis, make use of the micro moments to feel good — the sun on your skin, the children’s laughter, a short, silly video. Take a moment to read a book, to meet your closest friend -   notice what makes you happy and lean into that. Use your senses to indulge in a tiny bit of happiness. Enjoy every moment the present gives you!  Yes, it may seem strange but we CAN choose to be happy. Right now. And every single day.

Make the decision today, and never forget the brilliant quote by Leo Tolstoy: 

 “If you want to be happy, be”.